“Embrace something more authentic than fear.”
Kelsey and I sat down to discuss relationships, the loaded topic of cheating and fear.
One might assume that after being cheated a person would feel defeated and would lose a little bit of confidence or faith in love. However, it’s quite the opposite for charismatic Kelsey. Rather than looking at cheating as a catastrophic event Kelsey enrolled in a 3 month intensive Radical Self Love journey, where she focused on lessons learned and ways to heal from the inside out. The life lessons are what morphed her into rebranding her company to focus on self-love and relationships.
Being fearless -- what does that mean to you
Fearless means being completely connected to love. In being completely connected to our own sense of purpose and courage we activate a deep sense of inner strength that allows us to authenticity to shine in the world.
Fears come up but we should not be stopped by them. The fears that do pop up build us in to better versions of who we are . When we move past the dramatic nature of fear is when we truly open ourselves up to love’s potential.
How do you work through fear
I tell the truth, to others and most importantly I tell the the truth on myself. It is so simple and yet not always easy. I embrace the fact that I am afraid and I call myself out on it rather than hide from it.
The second thing I do to work through fear, after calling my attention to it, is I start to look for the lessons the presence of fear has to teach me. It is in this somewhat detached viewpoint I begin to regain my sense of power, strength and connectivity. As the fear starts to dissolve my energy becomes more expansive, open and freeing. Every time I go through experiences of this nature, my faith and trust grows in myself, and I become more and more present to how truly capable I am in powerfully facing anything life may bring my way.
If I am really terrified or stopped, I immediately take a personal time out to meditate or do breath work. I have coaches as well to help me through the very difficult times.
What piece of advice would you give to other females who may have been in the same situation as you
Honour what's true for yourself. Every circumstance is unique. Not everyone is meant to stay and not everyone is meant to go when it comes to cheating.
Intuition is your best guide. Sometimes accessing the answer can be a little bit muddy when emotions are at an all time high but ultimately if you really get still the answer is there. In being authentically true to ourselves our experience of life grows in its richness and depth.
Take care of yourself. Self care will be key to accessing those answers within. Make your wellbeing and state of mind your top priority. When you do it, it helps you to feel good about your decisions and your ability to clearly communicate what you need or want going forward.
Why do you think cheating is such a charged topic
I feel the reason we are so universally charged up by cheating, is because infidelity mirrors the greatest betrayal of them; all-self betrayal. When someone breaks the integrity or agreements of a relationship it hits us at the core. It unearths the hard to swallow truth that in some way shape or form we all cheat ourselves out of our potential everyday. It is much easier to villainize someone else and focus outside of ourselves instead of taking a real honest look inward. When we honestly look, we can see how we cheat ourselves out of our greatness, happiness, abundance, freedom and love every time we let fear win.
Fearless in love doesn’t mean the absence of fear, it just means that when fear shows up we do something expansive with it. Something that will lead us back to love.
Posted by: Nicole Parmar
Photo Credit: Suzanne Rushton Photography